You know what? Happily Ever Afters are Bullsh*t.
Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE them. I really do. Romance is chef’s kiss. Give me a corny Rom Com any day of the week. I will fall in love right along with the characters.
BUT.
A hard lesson I learned when becoming an adult was that it isn’t real life. And that hurts real relationships.
I’ve always had this idea of what love looked like in my head and I was just out there searching for it. That lead me to TOO many toxic relationships. But the thing was I WAS ALSO TOXIC.
The love you see in movies and books, while so so great, is not the love of real life. Or at least it isn’t all of it.
I was always under the impression that I’d find love and they’d love me and THE END. We would live happily ever after.
Nope. There is an after to that happily ever after. And it’s not always happy.
Because real love is hard. Real love is work. Real love is a choice.
Those warm fuzzy feelings don’t last forever. You gotta put in the work to keep them around.
And it’s a LOT of work. Especially when you have kids. Because then you have to make time for you and your partner, which isn’t always easy. The romance can easily fall through the cracks.
My partner and I struggle hard with that. We try to make us a priority but life happens. It’s a constant battle, and one we both try our best at. But y’all know how life can be. You can blink and 6 months have gone by and you realize you haven’t been on a genuine date in...gods know how long!
One of these days, we will find a good balance. I am confident in that knowledge, at least. We are both growing and learning each and every day.
One of my saving graces: Lists.
They seem to be one of my newest favorite things. I will even prioritize the items on my list so that the more important things get done first. It’s super simple and to the point. I’m a very visual person and it just helps to have that visual for guidance. It’s saved my sanity many of times. It’s also helped the overwhelm because once you break it down, you can take it one step at a time.
What about you guys? How do you balance your chaos?
You also need to find time for yourself sometimes, too. Things can get very overwhelming, and you need that individual time to recover.